Am I over-reacting about things that have happened with my girlfriend?

I have been dating a girl long distance for about 8 months now. I love this girl very much and she seems so great in so many aspects but honestly, looking in retrospect, it has been a rough ride. When I first got to know her, she withheld from me the fact that she was not truly over her ex husband of 8 years. I found this out because I caught her in several lies about talking to him. This really put a strain on the relationship. That was in the first 3 months, so the last 5 months have been a challenge for me to just get over that and move on. I feel like Ive done a good job because I do not ever throw it in her face or even bring it up...but it seems that she keeps doing things that slow the process of building my trust back up. But honestly, Im starting to wonder if I am just paranoid and over-reacting to these particular incidents because of the past. We talk several times a day. Text constantly. I feel that is necessary for a long distance relationship and of course she looves that. We also let each other know when we are going out with friends for the night and things like that. One evening she told me that her phone was low battery and she was going shopping with her girlfriend. But she would be home around 6 and call me when she got back if her phone died. I didnt hear from her until 3 a.m. I was worried sick about her and was so relieved to hear from her when I did but I got upset when I found out she went walking around the city and went to a bar with her girlfriend. When I asked her why she couldnt at least call me or email me or something from her friends phone just to let me know she was ok, she said she couldnt because she was too shy to ask to use her friends phone. My girlfriend is on of the most outgoing people I know. She will ask any random stranger any question at any time. It doesnt make any sense to me that she would be too shy to ask her good friend to use her phone real quick. So that upset me, but I got over it. Then just recently, I could hear her typing while on the phone so I asked her what she was doing and she said emailing a friend. The friend was a guy who she knows wants to date her. I asked her why she didnt tell me that he was still trying to talk to her and she said because "it was no big deal to her" But a short while ago, she got upset because she really felt like this girl on my Facebook really liked me. Even though she had never said anything flirtatious to me, my girlfriend just had it in her mind that she wanted to date me and she was jealous of her. So to make my girlfriend happy, I deleted her. But she is still talking to this guy who she knows for a fact wants to date her and its no big deal? About a week later, she said her battery was low while she was at work, and came home 2 hours late, and said it was because she was talking to a guy who is a customer that sometimes shops in the store she works. She is an istant manager at a dept store so I thought this was kind of wierd. Later on, she said he is a regular customer, then said well he actually used to work here, and he is my friend. Aside from the fact she changed her story 3 times, I let it go. Then a week later, she tells me that she thinks that this guy likes her because he has come into the store she works at twice in one week to see her. So I asked how long this had been going on and she came out and said that he has been coming into her store once a week for the past 6 weeks. Just to talk to shoot the breeze with her. She also told me that he said that he wasnt that into his girlfriend, never palnned to marry her, and that my girlfriend is giving up way too much to come and be with me. And asked for her number, and gave her his when she did not give hers away. And apparently, he said this and asked for her # like 5 weeks ago. I got pissed then because I feel like she should have let me know if some dude was making a point to come and hit on her at work. I would tell her if that was happening to me, plus I would put a stop to it. But she didnt, and she swears up and down that it was just nothing to her and she had absolutely no clue he was hitting on her until 6 weeks later when he came into her store twice in one week. She also says that it had nothing at all to do with her wanting a little attention because Im not there, even though she may not be flirting back or cheating, its bogus to me that she says its not about attention and she had no idea at all he was interested in her this whole time. Especially considering she can tell so quick if someone likes me, and expects me to shut them out of my life. She has been seeing a counselor, and apparently the counselor says I am a psycho jealous irrational person that will never trust her or change and she should break up with me, and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with what she is doing. my gf says she loves me and wants to be with me, but this stress is wearing me out, am i really over-reacting to these situations?